Tag Archives: Multiple Concussions

Southcoast MA HS Senior Soccer Player Describes Her Experiences With Concussion

By Lindsey Santos

santosOn October 26th, 2010, I received my first concussion. During a competitive soccer game against one of our conference teams, I was jumping up for a header, pulled down, and then deliberately kicked in back of the head twice, blocking the third kick with my hand. I stood back up on my feet and knew something was wrong. I tried to “shake it off” as any other athlete is taught to do, but when I started throwing up, I jogged myself off the field. When I told my parents I had a headache later on when we arrived back home, they took me into the emergency room to get checked out. During that visit I was diagnosed with a concussion. Already knowing somewhat about concussions, I figured it would be a “normal” two weeks of headaches. Little did I know that two weeks would turn into three months.

I had headaches every day, and I constantly felt tired and confused. My goals had to be set aside to take care of my health. Not being able to go to school caused me to fall behind my peers in the classroom and on the field. After having my concussion for about four weeks, my doctor recommended I go to see a Sports Medicine Specialist at Boston Children’s Hospital. There, I took my first Impact Test. Even though I did well on it, my symptoms clearly showed that I still had a concussion. I followed up every month with him basically just asking questions about how I felt and keeping track of the symptoms. Finally being cleared back to sports in January of 2011, I returned to play basketball for my high school.

After only being cleared fully for a week and half, I received my second concussion. Someone set a pick on me and just completely elbowed me in the process. I immediately knew that I had a concussion because when I got up, I was dizzy and my vision was blurred. But, I stayed in the game because I didn’t want to accept the fact that it had happened. My coach took me out of the game because I was clearly “not right”. The trainer checked me out and held me from going back into the game. Waking up the next morning with a severe headache forced another trip back up to Boston Children’s Hospital.

It was just the same routine as last time- as if I was never cleared. This time the specialist advised that I come up with some sort of agreement with my teachers for help in the subjects that I wasn’t doing well in. My school principal developed a 504 plan that provided me with accommodations to get extra time to take tests and hand in projects. Some of my teachers weren’t aware of my condition though and some major assignments were counted against me. I felt like I didn’t have any control over my life as if a carpet was ripped out from under me. I started to write and draw to help me through my PCS (Post Concussive Syndrome) recovery. During all of this I was also losing my friends. When they would be out having fun, I was stuck at home with a headache crying myself to sleep. They would get mad when I told them I was going to stay home because I didn’t feel well. They started to believe I was faking this concussion to get away with things, like quarterlies, homework, and get-togethers.

After another three months had passed, I was cleared for contact sports again. I was feeling good and healthy, even with two concussions under my belt. Though things felt altered, I was learning to cope and accept it. I could not let my two concussions defeat me any longer. I had to face these obstacles head on and regain control of the things that mattered most in my life. Even though I am still dealing with headaches three years later and break down every once in awhile, I strive to make a difference. I introduced the Impact Test to my school and even though the athletes hate taking them, I know it can make a difference for the better. I also help other students in school who have a concussion. I guide them, and I’m most importantly a friend to them. I don’t want anyone to go through what I did. Going through these challenges has certainly had a large impact on my life. They have prepared me for other bumps in the road that I will face as I live the rest of my life.

“Healing Heads”- Massachusetts HS Junior on Her Concussion Journey

{ Editor’s Note: At the ripe old age of 17, Madeline Uretsky has become a prominent voice in concussion education. She was the subject of a Boston Globe feature story on concussion in January of 2013. Her story has also been highlighted by the Brain Injury Association of Massachusetts, The Salem (MA) News, and a number of concussion-centric websites and blogs. She has spoken publicly on concussion, most recently at the Boston Acquired Brain Injury Support (BABIS) Walk. Madeline is truly a concussion education warrior after our own hearts, and she is an important voice. – Jay}

“Healing Heads”

mad1My name is Madeline Uretsky, and I am a junior at Bishop Fenwick High School in Peabody, MA. What used to be known as “getting your bell rung”, and being told to just “shake it off”, are no longer accepted ways of dealing with concussions.  Thanks to modern research, we know now that concussions are in fact, brain injuries, and must be dealt with as such. They are to be taken seriously, regardless of the severity, because the short term and long term effects can be devastating. Ignoring the symptoms and the mistreatment of them can have lasting effects to the brain, as we have learned from the many NFL players now suffering from the many concussions they sustained, but ignored, while playing. Any subsequent hit to the head before the prior concussion has healed can have profound effects on the brain as I have learned. I am just one of the many thousands of people who have suffered a severe concussion, and whose life has been forever changed by it. You never think it’s going to happen to you.

On October 11, 2011, while playing in my soccer game, I was tripped from behind while sprinting for the ball, fell on my forehead, snapped my neck back, and fell and hit my forehead again in the same place in a matter of seconds. I knew something was wrong immediately, but I had no idea how serious it would be. My symptoms did not become apparent until about 48 hours later. I could not sit up, tolerate any light at all, I was tired, and had an excruciating headache. It has now been a year and seven months since the moment of impact.

I spent the first 3 months of my concussion lying in bed at home, in a dark room, and on complete brain rest. This brain rest meant that I could not watch TV, use a computer, phone, draw, text, read anything, or do any sort of homework or exercise. In other words, I could just sleep, lie in bed, and not go to school.

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At this time, my symptoms were numerous and very high on the symptoms scale at the doctor. I had severe headaches as well as up to 165 very sharp pains all over my head every day. I also had severe whiplash, disorientation, memory loss, extreme fatigue, dizziness, balance problems, trouble following a conversation, ringing in my ears, and I could not tolerate any bright colors, light, or noise of any kind. My sleep at night was erratic and filled with nightmares. You would never know this by just looking at someone with a concussion because they do not have a cast like a broken bone. The brain is still injured but on the outside you look fine.

I went to my pediatrician weekly, and my neurosurgeon monthly, for a symptom evaluation. On a scale of 0-6, I had all 5’s and 6’s during those three months of brain rest; I could not believe how awful I felt. I started going weekly to a massage therapist who practices a type of acupressure that helps brain injured patients. I liked going because it was a way to relax myself, even though it was painful. I continue to go on an as needed basis, and also do many other kinds of alternative therapies that have been helpful such as chiropractic, herbs, speech therapy, balance therapy, eye coordination exercises, and others.

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As these weeks turned into months, it became apparent that there was no end in sight for me. I was isolated from my friends and my school, yet I felt so awful that I accepted that there was just nothing I could do about it, except rest, and wait it out. I had visitors, on a limited basis, but I did not even feel well enough to enjoy myself. I was unable to engage in any kind of conversation, and I would randomly fall asleep. There were times that I could not even remember that I had visitors.

I missed all but five weeks of my sophomore year and I am still not cleared for physical activity other than walking. I did catch up with my schoolwork over the summer of 2012, and now I am on a full schedule at school but with accommodations such as extended time on tests. I took my SAT test without accommodations and that was a challenge. I did some extra preparations to help myself concentrate and have the energy to last the entire test. Overall, it went well and I always wonder how I would have felt during the test if I had not had a concussion. Recently, I also had a setback that kept me out of school for a week after a re-injury to my neck from a visit to the physical therapist. What makes my concussion so severe is that I still have all of my symptoms over a year and a half later, just to a lesser degree. In addition, I have learning disabilities now that I had never had before. Focusing, processing new information, multi-tasking, and comprehending orally are some of them. I am doing much better than I was, but I still have a ways to go. I am hoping to one-day wake up symptom-free.

When you sustain a serious brain injury, your life, and the lives of those around you, are greatly impacted. What you once knew as “normal” no longer exists, things that you could count on for yourself no longer exist, and what you have to do to achieve, and accept, a “new normal”, is a difficult process, both emotionally and physically. I could no longer do any form of physical activity at all, yet I was accustomed to playing sports every day of my life. Before my concussion, I was a very involved and active student – my freshman year, I played soccer, hockey, and winter and spring track.

I decided early on in my recovery that I was going to do whatever the doctors told me, and I was definitely NOT going to let this concussion get the best of me. It’s not who I was before my injury, so I wasn’t going to allow myself to become that person. I was open to any kind of treatment that could help me. As I started to feel a bit better, I began taking baby steps to regain my life. I started to use my computer to reach out to others, as well as to learn more about my brain injury.

Along the way, I decided that there must be other teenagers out there suffering as I was, and who perhaps don’t have the kind of support that I have, so that became my mission – to help them. Life as a teenager is difficult enough, so just imagine being a teenager with up to 165 headaches per day, living in a constant state of fogginess, having memory loss, unable to carry on a conversation without physical pain, sensitivity to light and noise, and generally not being able to live the life I once had.

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Speaking at the Boston Acquired Brain Injury Support Group Walk in Jamaica Plain, October 2012

Returning to school as a student with a brain injury is a very scary proposition. Will people look at me funny? Will they ask me a lot of questions? Will they think I’m faking? – after all, I look fine. These were the many questions that I had before I returned.

My school was so supportive with my accommodations that I decided to write a chapter for a book about concussions in sports, and I have been a regular blogger about various brain injury topics, for several websites. I was the speaker at the 10th annual Brain Injury Walk in Boston in October, and the Pediatric Brain Injury Conference in November. I was featured in Bay State Parenting magazine, the Salem Evening News, and the Boston Globe as well. I will continue my crusade for concussion awareness, because I feel that this has happened to me for a reason, and that is my mission to help others.

As long and difficult as my road to recovery has been, it has also been extremely rewarding. I have been able to mentor, counsel and befriend many other kids with concussions, and this has made me feel so much better. The most important advice I can give is to stay positive because things improve over time. Brain injuries are a work in progress, there may not be a change on a daily basis, but improvement will be seen. Just because life is different than it used to be, it doesn’t mean it isn’t as great – you just have to find a way to make it as great, even if you have to do it differently.

 

Reality of Post Concussion Syndrome Driven Home By Web Search Statistics

By Jay Fraga

As the founder of this site, I take a keen interest in trying to figure out how people are getting here. Many arrive at The Knockout Project because of an article or post that has been shared via social media. Some people get here by accident; many after their own accident while they search for answers in an attempt to get some relief.  As someone who still suffers from some rather lousy post concussion symptoms daily, I can’t help but to read our site’s internal statistics and envision the suffering on the other end when a person types a phrase or question into a search engine that ultimately leads them here.

I’d like to share with you some of the searches that have led people to our site within the last four months. Some of the search queries offer poignant insight into the suffering that can exist post-concussion. For me, these queries are often hard to read. I’ve felt many of these symptoms and know how bad they can be physically and mentally. In that particular light, they’re not just search queries: they’re my life. They’re the lives of other athletes that I know. And now they are an unfortunate part of someone else’s life; someone seeing our site for the first time via a search engine query.

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Concussions are no joke. They entail much more than just an abstract sounding word. This list only scratches the surface of that reality.

The Fog

By Jay Fraga

oldschool

Jay, 1982

The fog rolls in without notice. Some days, you wake up and it is there. On others, you are lulled into a false sense of security; you forget that it lurks, waiting to cover you in its confusion, emptiness, and uncertainty.

Yesterday was good. Today, I woke up and the fog was there. Simple tasks became monumental ones. Normal thought process became labored. This weekend, I called my wife on her cell phone when I heard her car start up in the driveway and start to pull out. I was upset and asked her why she didn’t say goodbye to any of us. She said, “Jay, I just gave you a kiss a minute and a half ago and said, “See you later”.” Hearing that and not being able to remember even a sliver of the experience sucked every ounce of air out of the room.

You try to take experiences like that and shove them far away someplace. You try to marginalize them and tell yourself that they don’t matter; that they’ll pass. But, they are scary. They make you wonder. Where you once felt strong and unbeatable, those experiences make you feel weak. I will turn 41 in three months and I’m not quite sure what is happening to me.

Ray Bradbury, “The Foghorn”:

“One day many years ago a man walked along and stood in the sound of the ocean on a cold sunless shore and said, “We need a voice to call across the water, to warn ships; I’ll make one. I’ll make a voice like all of time and all of the fog that ever was; I’ll make a voice that is like an empty bed beside you all night long, and like an empty house when you open the door, and like trees in autumn with no leaves. A sound like the birds flying south, crying, and a sound like November wind and the sea on the hard, cold shore. I’ll make a sound that’s so alone that no one can miss it, that whoever hears it will weep in their souls, and hearths will seem warmer, and being inside will seem better to all who hear it in the distant towns. I’ll make me a sound and an apparatus and they’ll call it a Fog Horn and whoever hears it will know the sadness of eternity and the briefness of life.”


An Athlete’s Story of Re-ordered Expectations in The Wake of Multiple Concussions

By Kate Parhiala

kateshotIn 2010, the UCI Mountain Bike World Cup announced that it would have an event in the United States, at Windham Mountain in New York. This same year was my first as a professional mountain bike racer and I had the opportunity to participate in the four-cross event at this race. Four-cross is a downhill event where four racers at a time go head-to-head down a track with flat and banked turns, jumps, rocks, drops, and whatever obstacle the course builder decides to throw in. In each round the top two racers move on and the third and fourth are eliminated. To determine groups everyone takes a timed seeding run.

containerdropSuccessfully navigating the jump where I ended up having problems later on.

I never got that far. Before the race there is an allotted time during which riders can take practice runs on the course. Everything about this course was huge, especially the jumps. I had been carefully inspecting and attempting the course bit by bit. By my third practice run I attempted to string the whole thing together. As I approached the big step-down jump I was much farther left than where I had been hitting it previously. There were two landings to this jump: I had been aiming for the closer one, same as in the other runs, but was carrying a bit more speed this time around. I ended up landing on the flat area between the close landing and the far one. All that I remember as I began to fall off the back of the bike was thinking “Wow, this is embarrassing.” About an hour later I woke up in an ambulance.

windham_crash

The big crash at Windham. The medics are trying to free my leg. I don’t remember any of this.

There is a considerable chunk of time that I don’t remember. I have been told that I was physically unconscious for about 30 seconds but mentally I was completely blacked out for at least an hour. The medics were asking me questions to check on my cognition. I knew my name and what my bib number was but couldn’t remember signing up for the race or how I had gotten there. Apparently my left foot had not come unclipped from the pedals and my left leg had become pinned between the rear wheel and the seat. The medics had to let the air out of the tire to extract my leg, which they thought was definitely broken. I was carted down the mountain and into ski patrol where they put an IV in and eventually an ambulance came to bring me to the trauma center in Albany, about an hour away. We were almost there when I finally came to, strapped to a backboard and very nauseous.

brokenhelmet

 My helmet after concussion #2. I should have bought a new one instead of just replacing the visor.

I remember very little of my stay in the emergency department at Albany Medical Center. I think they got me in right away for a brain scan and x-rays. Luckily no bleeding in the brain and only two badly sprained ankles. I don’t believe I was given any instructions on how to care for a concussion after I was discharged because I spent the next few days doing things I shouldn’t have been doing. With two more days booked at the World Cup, my boyfriend (now fiance) and I wanted to stick around and watch the races. I was hobbling around the mountain on my crutches in the bright sunlight with the loud crowds drinking the occasional beer.

jumpThe day after the crash – concussed and sore in front of the jump that took me out.

It took until going to work the Monday after for me to realize what a mess I was. I just remember sitting at my desk staring blankly at my computer not being able to think. It hurt to think. I couldn’t remember a lot of things that I had previously been working on. My speech was a little slurred and it was difficult to come up with words. By mid-day I finally told my boss that I had to go to the doctor. After taking the subway and the bus home I got in my car to drive to the doctor’s office. Very quickly I discovered that I could barely control the car. My reaction time was so delayed that I kept almost crashing every time a car was stopped in front of me. The doctor told me that I needed to take it easy for a while after a bad concussion and should take at least a week off from work. I left my car at my parents’ house so I wouldn’t try to drive it.

It took at least a month or two for me to start recovering from the most acute symptoms. It was such a relief when I could finally concentrate for most of a workday. I still have trouble remembering anything from that general timeframe. In addition, something strange happened with my memory: things got rearranged. Memories from 10 or 15 years ago were suddenly vivid like they had occurred yesterday while more recent events felt like the distant past. I began having extremely vivid dreams as well (more so than usual) and started remembering little things that were long forgotten. These strange memory issues are still affecting me today.

This was not my first concussion, it was my third. My first happened during a BMX race in 2003. I crashed going over the first jump and hit the left side of my head really hard. There was a bright flash of light and an immediate headache. This was described to me as a mild concussion and I did not notice any residual symptoms. My second concussion actually went undiagnosed. I didn’t realize that I had one. In July of 2010 I was at a downhill mountain bike race and crashed during practice. It was one of those crashes where I went over the bars and the first thing to hit the ground was my face because it happened way too fast to get my hands off the bars. My full-face motocross helmet actually dug some rocks out of the dirt as my head plowed through. I hit so hard that I felt like I should have blacked out. I was definitely out of it and a little confused but I chalked it up to being shaken by the crash. I didn’t think this was a concussion because there was no loss of consciousness and no flash of light. In retrospect it definitely was. I just did not feel right for weeks afterwards but I replaced the shattered visor on my helmet and was back in action the next weekend. This was only a little over a month before the big crash at Windham.

Fast-forward to the 2011 season: I ended up suffering a fourth minor concussion over the summer and a fifth in October, both practicing for downhill bike races (even with a new helmet). The cumulative effect of this, in addition to the memory changes that I still deal with, includes mood changes and migraine headaches. I became significantly depressed and anxious after having 4 concussions in 15 months. In addition I started getting migraine headaches so bad that I would throw up (luckily only a few times a month). Still, it was difficult for me to realize how all of this fit together but I finally decided that I needed help when none of it was improving during the 2012 season.

I began seeing a new doctor who referred me for neuro-psych evaluation. Most of the testing done was negative but a brain MRI actually revealed mild atrophy in the temporal and parietal lobes of my brain. It was strongly suggested that I quit anything that put me in significant risk of further head trauma because further injury could be devastating. This especially meant no more downhill and no more BMX. This was very difficult news for me. I had focused my life around these things for quite some time and it was hard to go from thinking about what World Cup races I wanted to enter the next season to selling my downhill bike and letting my sponsorships expire. I really miss that life but I had no other choice.

It’s a very strange feeling to have an injury that I can never recover from. Even though the symptoms are somewhat managed with medications the physical damage is irreparable. Even before the doctors advised that I stop racing downhill I knew that things weren’t quite right. It is always difficult to get back in the saddle after a bad injury because you’re shaken and anxious. But with time one can usually overcome this. Because I’ve injured the very part of me that controls those thoughts and emotions I was never able to recover my confidence in the two years before I finally quit. I was getting faster and developing better technique but becoming more and more scared and anxious. I know that before continuously landing on my head this wasn’t the case but it’s hard to remember what that felt like.

Since the brain scan results I’ve had to dial the excitement back a quite a bit. Being an adrenaline junkie causes my happiness and sanity to be dependent on doing active and exciting things. At this point I’ve tried to create a balance between acceptable risk and not being bored and miserable. I continue to alpine ski and still race (while wearing a great helmet, of course). While there is still risk, I have not suffered a head injury in the 26 years that I have been skiing (and I hope to continue this trend). On the biking side I have been doing more cross country mountain biking and have started racing cyclo-cross. In addition I am becoming more involved in mountain bike coaching. I still do easy jumps and drops but try to stick to a controlled environment and will not ride beyond my ability.

When it comes to mountain biking I firmly believe that fewer injuries of all types would be sustained if people sought professional instruction, specifically on bike handling, rather than the trial and error method. This is part of the reason I have become more involved with coaching. If a rider learns solid fundamental skills before attempting larger obstacles he or she will be able to more safely progress. Many riders, including myself, did not have this opportunity. To paraphrase my friend and fellow coach, former pro Karen Eagan, if you feel lucky that you just landed that drop DO NOT go bigger; Practice it again and again until you are completely comfortable and then you can progress to the next one. Mountain bike instruction has only recently become more widely available and is something that this sport has been severely lacking. Downhill racing can never be made completely safe, and it shouldn’t be (that’s part of the allure), but riders can at least be equipped with the skills to sufficiently tackle any course they are confronted with.

Having this experience has caused a significant change in mindset. I’ve become comfortable with backing down from certain challenges like drops or jumps if I don’t feel completely comfortable. I can always try another day when the conditions are right. Why go for it now? Is it really worth it? Some things I will probably never attempt and now I’m ok with that. I would rather be riding my bike and skiing for many more years than possibly risk it all because I couldn’t tell myself no. As written of world-renowned steep skier Andreas Fransson in a recent issue of Powder Magazine, “He is most proud of the runs he didn’t take, because backing off is harder than dropping in.”

New Jersey HS Soccer Player On Life With Multiple Concussions

By Alicia Jensen

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I was hit. Hit hard. I got up, and stumbled around. I was losing my balance, seeing stars and everything was spinning. I had no idea where I was, or what I was doing. I didn’t even recall the date. The referee blew the whistle to stop the game, and as everyone took a knee, I lay there in a complete daze. He said to me, “21 are you okay?” I, of course, said, “Yes, I’m fine. Just keep playing.”

I turned to a few of my team mates and asked questions like, “Where are we? How have I been playing? What’s the score? Who’s their best player?” I knew something wasn’t right, but I didn’t want to admit it. I let my teenage attitude take over and kept playing. Reality hit me again late in the second half with another blow to the head and the realization that I should have stopped after the first hit.

April 22, 2012 was the first day of my new “life”, of my new “normal”, and of my new “journey”.

I would be lying if I said that this concussion hasn’t changed my life. It has completely changed it in every aspect possible. It has changed me physically, emotionally, mentally, academically, and socially. It has put me in a position of trying to find myself, which, for a 16 year old, is still in the process of happening to begin with.

In July 2012, for my 16th birthday, my parents took my siblings and I to Disney World. My doctors had restricted me from any rides or attractions that would aggravate my symptoms. Once again, I didn’t listen. I went on the legendary and iconic “Rockin’ RollerCoaster”. For those of you who have never been on it, it is a concussed person’s nightmare. I didn’t know when the ride was going to start and didn’t pay attention to the “Keep your head back” signs. The ride started and I hit my head on the seat and immediately blacked out. *Bam!* another concussion. My doctors ruled this one as “AMA”, or, against medical advice.

I didn’t realize how stupid my decision was until I had to start all over again at Vestibular Therapy.

I just wanted to be a kid; I wanted to live my life. I knew that I wasn’t supposed to be on those rides but for some reason I didn’t care. Afterwards, I just wanted to be reassured that this concussion hadn’t totally taken my life away. Let’s just say I didn’t get that reassurance.

Fast forward to August 2012- I was tested by a Neuropsychologist and was put on half days for school. To be honest, I didn’t follow that accommodation as much as I should have. I didn’t want to be at home. I wanted to be at school with my friends and actually be around people. My doctors didn’t understand that the time I was out was instructional time that I was losing, and I was falling behind. In October 2012, I was put on a medical 504 Plan, which is basically just an official medical accommodations plan for school. For some reason, this basic plan hit me hard mentally. How did I go from an honor roll student and A’s and B’s, to needing help everyday? It was frustrating because I wasn’t used to needing help, as I am so used to doing everything myself. Asking for help when I need it is a huge struggle internally that I still deal with, even though I know it is necessary and that it is okay to ask for help.

I can’t remember what being a normal teenager feels like. Forget parties, because crowds make me feel overwhelmed and anxious. Forget football games, because the lights and the noise are a killer. Forget movie theaters and big restaurants, because the dim lighting and people give an instant headache. I shouldn’t have to live my life like this, wondering every day not IF I’ll get a headache, but WHEN I do get a headache, how bad it will be. Should I go home early from school? Should I not even go to school? Questions I ask myself every day aren’t questions a normal teenager should have to ask themselves on a regular basis.

I can’t focus in school with a headache. Sometimes it’s a waste of time even being in class because I’m not actually doing anything but sitting there with my head down and praying for the class to end and for the teacher to turn the lights out and stop talking. But, I know that this feeling won’t last forever. I know that I’m headed the right way to a full recovery. I know that I’ll get into college and although it may be a struggle, I know that I can do it. I won’t let my dreams of becoming a Doctor specializing in Sports Medicine be changed because I can’t handle college.

Sports have been my life since I was 4 years old. I have been out on that soccer field every week and weekend for 12 years and never missed a chance to kick the ball around. Soccer has always been a way to release my stress and forget about all my problems. That’s why hearing the words “Alicia, I don’t medically advise you to play soccer again” were some of the hardest words I have ever had to hear in my life. Being told you can’t do something that you have always done is hard to accept. I didn’t know anything but soccer and I didn’t want to know anything else. I liked the way things were.

I guess you could say I don’t like change, but this wasn’t just a simple change. It’s a change that there is nothing I can do about; nothing I can say to my doctors will make them clear me to play soccer again. I want to say that I have accepted that I will never play soccer again, but it still hurts every time I hear people talking about it. Every time somebody brings up a game, a tournament, or even practice, it hurts to think that I’m missing out on something- not by choice but instead by force.

It is hard to explain to people what Post-Concussion Syndrome is. Some people like to claim it as “faking”, “wanting attention”, or even “excuses for being lazy”. Nobody understands the pain that PCS sufferers go through everyday. It isn’t “just a concussion”; it is something that changes lives. I can’t begin to tell you how frustrating it is when people ask me, “You’re still concussed?!”

So much for not wanting to talk about it; I always just nod my head “yes” and walk away. I hate talking about my PCS to people who don’t get it. Why would anybody do something like this for attention? PCS doesn’t just affect me; it affects my family, friends, teachers, coaches, and administrators.

Some say we are put in situations like this to make us stronger, I truly believe that. This concussion has taught me that I need to make the most of every second that I feel well. It has taught me that I need to persevere and overcome any obstacle I face. It has taught me that everything could always be worse and that I have to be thankful that I’m still alive. I can’t take each and every day for granted. I’ve got to focus on the positives of every situation. I learn new things every day from my PCS that some people don’t learn until much later in life.

I see that as a positive in this whole ugly situation. This concussion has changed my life- and it is hard. But, because of those things, I wouldn’t take back a second of it.